Friday, October 28, 2011
A confession: I have veneer-ial dis-ease, I think I caught it at Church
No this does not have anything to do with the sexual mores of the Western Church at the moment. Well in actual fact it does really. AS I have continued to read about the monastic and new monastic movement and other books like Elaine Heath's 'The Mystic Way of Evangelism : A contemplative Vision for Christian Outreach.' I am aware that my christian life is very much like a veneer, it may look good to those who like the type of veneer I've tacked over who I am... But is there depth? Does it reach to the very depth of my being? I'm not sure... OK I confess I need to be converted more and more day by day in every way.
Sadly, I think I caught this veneer-ial dis-ease, this malaise of the soul, from Church, or at least we share the shame. I fear that it had reached in and infected us... People talk of the Christian faith in Africa as being like veneer "a mile wide by an inch thick". But I fear it is the case in the west as well. And this veneer-ial disease is affecting our ability to reproduce, it's causing infertility and effects our ability to find the intimacy in our communion with God and one another that we desperately seek. I hope it is not fatal.
Maybe for me and the church its part of the veneer-ial dis-ease. We want a patch a quick fix a download that will do the trick.
In a matrix like moment I feel like that just maybe the social theory of Jean Baudrillard may be right we've bought into a simulacra. A model, veneer where the reality behind it no longer exists. No not in a modernistic 'godless faith' kind of way. But that its only once we are embrace the invitation of 'welcome to the desert of the real we can go searching and seeking again the transforming presence of God and allow our beings to be transforrned and healed of Venner-ial disease.
I see hope in the echo of a deep faith, a deep contemplation that allows one not only to encounter God at the core of our being, but also die to self and serve the hurting broken world around me/us. A concept of deep church I have only started to hear (A CS Lewis term).
This is not a jump to an answer it is a confession.