The term ‘good grief’ seems to be an oxymoron, a
contradiction in terms, how can that keen mental suffering or distress caused
by affliction and loss, be Good? Yes, it
is the natural process we go through when we lose someone or something that we
love, it’s a natural reaction, a hard one to go through, with sharp sorrow,
full of regret, anger, dark fields of depression, watered with tears where we
feel alone and abandoned. It’s the process we must go through to come to terms
with the fact that someone has gone, that things have changed, and it will
never be the same, but we must go on. It can be a healthy process, as we make
that adjustment well, as well as we can, or an unhealthy one, where you can
find yourselves stuck at some point in the grief cycle, unable to break free;
break through. I don’t think you can call it Good.
At the Cross we encounter Good Grief…
As we had it read out from Mark’s gospel today we see the
cross as a scene full of pain, suffering and sorrow. Simon the Cyrene is forced
to carry the cross beam to which Jesus is to be nailed presumably because he is
too weak from the beatings he has taken to do it himself. He is taken up onto a
hill called Golgotha or the scull, a description of a round hill with no
vegetation on top, that would have been beside the road into Jerusalem. He is
nailed to that cross and it is lifted upright and put in place. So he can be
displayed to all by the Roman’s as a
show of what this regime does to anyone who breaks the law or is even accused
of standing against them. Rome has won again.
We often talk of insults and criticism as giving someone
grief, and Mark’s account of the crucifixion focuses on Jesus being given
grief. Passers-by, the chief priests and teachers of the law, and those
crucified with him mock him. ‘he said he would destroy the temple and rebuild
it in three days’, ‘he said he could save others, he can’t even save himself’,
come down, conform to our understanding of God’s messiah, then we will see and
believe’. Pilate's taunt to the religious leaders who had bought him into this
whole sordid affair… nailed above Jesus the Words ‘King of the Jews’ this is
what will happen to anyone who considers rising against Roman rule.
The Grief of those who had been with him as they stand at a
distance and see what is happening. Mark notes it is the women who had been
with Jesus in Galilee, the disciples are nowhere to be seen, we know from
John’s account that he was there as was Jesus mother, but mark and his source
may only have noticed the women standing at a distance. Women who in Israel’s
history in world history are the ones
who carry the brunt of grief and sorrow in the face of our inhumanity.
There is the grief and anguish in the only words that Mark
records Jesus saying on the cross. Spoken in Jesus native Aramaic ‘Eloi Eloi
Lama Sabachthani” which means ‘my God,
my God why have you forsaken me’. In this hour in this place of pain and death
Jesus identifies with the depth of human suffering. It’s not a
statement of doubt, it is the first words of Psalm 22 which is a
messianic psalm which is full of verses that point to the cross, a psalm that
is also one of deep trust and faith. Jesus cry is still to ‘My God’ an
acknowledgement of faith and trust and relationship. R Alan Cole helps us to unpack
one possibility of what is happening here when he wrote:
“if there was a
barrier between the Father and the Son at that moment, it could only be because
of sin, the son knew no sin, so it could only be our sin that cost him such
agony. Here is the heart of the cross here is the mystery which no painting or
sculpture, with distorted face, can ever begin to show, because we fail to
realise the true nature of punishment for sin, as separation from God, and
therefore the true nature and depth of the agony borne by him.”
This agony this sense of abandonment is reflected in the sky
turning dark for three hours.
Finally, there is grief because of death. Jesus dies, and as
this is the day of preparation for the sabbath and Passover the authorities
allow Jesus to be taken down and buried in a tomb belonging to Joseph of
Arimathea. The women follow along and they see where Jesus is laid as they will
want to come back and make sure he receives the correct treatment in death that
he did no receive in life.
At the Cross we encounter Good Grief, and we’ve looked at
the grief but how can this be Good?
There is the grief of a Roman execution using a most
torturous and violent vile method, but all the way through this there is
another narrative being written, another reality playing out. Unlike in Matthew
and Luke, it is not pointed out to us so blatantly. It’s is God’s plan and purpose, Jesus use of
the open line of Psalm 22 invites us to see what is happening through its
prophetic lens. The guards we are told sitting down and gambling over his
clothes foretold. The jar of wine being offered to him foretold, the mockery and
taunting, foretold. Scripture witnesses to the fact that God not Caesar, God
not the religious authorities and their plans and scheme is in control. This is
not a ignominious end to a good teacher, rather it is God at work. Instead of a
defeat Mark paints it as a coronation, Pilate's words more true than he could
imagine, here is Jesus the king of the Jews… It is a Roman centurion who
provides Mark’s narrative with its high point. When by some divine revelation
he sees what is going on and realises ‘surely this man was God’s son’.
In a deep irony, the grief that was thrown at Jesus tells
the story of what is happening here. They meant is as mockery, but rather in it
is deep truth. This is how Jesus planned to tear down the temple and build it
again in three days. Relationship with
God was no longer going to be though a building and sacrificial system, but was
going to be made possible by the person of Jesus Christ and his death on the cross
for the forgiveness of sins. By not coming down from the cross, by not saving
himself, rather trusting in God, Jesus was going to save many others. It was
his death taking the punishment for what we had done wrong, that would enable
us to be forgiven and set free. Jesus was God’s messiah and king and this is
the way he was going usher in God’s kingdom. Not by some superhuman act but by
as Philippians 2 puts it being obedient unto death, even death on a cross, because
of that God would raise him up. It was not going to be that we may see and then
believe that the high priests demanded rather it is by grace, and faith in
Jesus that we will be able to see.
The women who stand off at a distance and weep, who follow
to see where Jesus is buried are not left in their grief and sorrow, rather
they are changed into witnesses, able to tell of what they have seen and
spoiler alert they are the ones who have the great privilege of being the first
to witness Jesus resurrection and to bear witness to the fact “he is risen, he
is risen indeed’.
It is Good because ‘God has not abandoned us’, Jesus took on
the pain we encounter and the deep separation from God, so that we may come to
know God intimately as our loving father. So many people wrestle with
understanding what Jesus did on the Cross, the various theories of atonement,
but in Marks gospel there is one symbolic act which shows the reality of what
Jesus achieved. As he died mark tells us the curtain in the temple was torn in
two. The curtain in the temple was hung in front of the holy of holy’s the
place where Jewish people believed held the very presence of God. It was only
entered once a year by a high priest and only after many sacrifices for the
forgiveness of sin. It symbolised the very real chasm between sinful broken
humans and a holy God. But now God was no longer going to be with his people in
this special place. The barrier between us and God is removed. The temple and
sacrificial system was no longer needed, as in his death and resurrection,
Jesus had made the way for us to come to know God. It is putting our trust in
Jesus that we can come to know God, that we are able to have a clean and fresh
start and be reconciled with God and with one another.
Finally, it is good grief because the Story does not end as
the stone is rolled across the mouth of a borrowed tomb. It does not finish
with the women and Joseph marking where Jesus is laid so they can make it the
focus for memory, future mourning or even veneration. … it is Friday but Sunday
is coming. We have Good grief because at the Cross we meet the Good God, who
raised Jesus to life again. We can have new and abundant life lived in
relationship with God because Jesus is raised from the dead. Death and sin are
defeated. It is the wondrous truth that Jesus death and resurrection makes new
life possible. We started our exploration of good grief by talking of Simon the
Cyrene being forced into service to carry Jesus Cross, and even in that small
detail we see how these events can change people’s lives, as we are told that
Simon's sons Rufus and Alexander are known to the church. If Mark was written in
Rome then this could be Rufus who is talked of as a leader in that church in
Paul’s letter to the Romans.
It is Good Grief because it is the starting point of lives
down through the last two thousand years that have been changed and
transformed. This year we are marking the 500th year of the
reformation, the re-centering of the Christian faith on the wonderful truth
that salvation is by grace alone, through faith alone. It is the hope that you
and I have, the new life we share.
The term Good Grief may seem an oxymoron, a
contradiction in terms. But I would pray this Easter you may know the reality
of Good grief in your life. Grief is the process by which we deal with the loss
of a loved one or a significant part of our life. The Good Grief of the Cross, is the process
by which we allow Jesus death to change how we live. We come to him aware of
all we have done wrong, we thank him for dying in our place, and ask him to
forgive us, and acknowledge him as our Lord and saviour. That is Good grief that
leads to new life. We can know Good Grief.. A good God who Saves us. 
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